On Thursday morning I bought a lnew swimming costume. Had I been slightly more organised, I might have noticed sooner that my old one was disintegrating rapidly and ordered a new one from eBay. I am not that organised. So I ran into Tesco at a stupid hour of the morning to get a new (and preferably cheap) one.
This is what I ended up with, for the bargain price of £12! Looks nice, doesn’t it? What a shame, then, that the creator of this swimming costume didn’t design it in a way that anyone could actually wear it and swim successfully.
Now, in fairness, I am a little (lot) on the pear-shaped side, but I am fairly sure that I’m not alone in that! I’m in no way flat-chested, but the foam pads were excessively large and shaped in a way that I managed to look like a Baywatch extra – especially as the V-neck is substantially deeper than in appears (noticeably below the bottom of my cleavage – such as it is). This design meant that every time I propelled myself forward in the swimming pool, the top half of the costume filled with water and I had to adjust it at the end of every length to avoid accidentally flashing the elderly early-morning swimmers! Interestingly, the Tesco website claims that the pads are removable, but 6 o’clock this morning saw me cutting the mesh out to remove the pads – large foam pads are not removable through teeny tiny gaps – and sewing the neckline to a more demure one.
As a larger lady, I do struggle to find low-cost swimming costumes in my size – my best option is usually supermarkets in summertime or buying online. (I do also have the same problem with sportswear – apparently only UK size 18 and below require workout clothes… not encouraging those of us who need to to exercise I think, but I digress.) I have had this problem before – the majority of swimming costumes sold in supermarkets or high street stores do not seem to be designed for anyone to swim in, only for looking good. Surely, surely it cannot be that difficult to design one that is both flattering and functional? In fact, I’m not too bothered if it’s flattering as long as it fits, it works and it’s not too expensive. That’s not too much to ask, is it?